I was quite startled when this photo came into my inbox earlier this year. I hadn’t seen it before. It was from Megan Rose, my nephews’ step-sister who is
the child in the picture. Sadly her cousins Sinéad and Aoife are dead, hit and run and unintentional injury. Naming them and the causes does not ease the pain in any way. I have always been of the view that we are part of a very large coterie of parents
whose children die before them.
They die from accident, homicide, suicide, cancer and heart disease. There are populations of young people who die in famine, war-torn zones or refugees. But behind each individual
is a set of parents who are left with unspeakable grief and loss.
And so, 1st August is our Aoife reminder day, sixteen years gone this year.
I am always prompted
to write something for her at this time. Please read, share and send me feedback.
the time of year again and again
wouldnt you think that after all these years
it would get easier and less of a belt in the gut
but it doesn’t if anything the blow is harder
add a guilt attack for the periods of not remembering
sitting in the heat and high humidity
in a place that was largely of her getting
she directed pearse to show
us the location
we fell in love with it and came back to buy
so now sixteen and fourteen years on
we perch, swelter and are grateful
not grateful for her unintentional injuries
for the big hole and ache her absence leaves
grateful for having her as part of us for that time
grateful even for
the irritations and blowouts
grateful to see how she grew and blossomed
grateful to have loved her so dearly
30th July 2020